Scatterbrain! (iwsg post)

It’s IWSG day! Be sure to visit the main page and check out the many insecure writers there 🙂InsecureWritersSupportGroup

This isn’t really an insecurity, well, maybe it is… I feel lately that I am so scatterbrained! Is it because I am writing, or because I am getting old? I don’t know.

I’d like to blame the writing. That would be easier. And sometimes it IS the writing. Sometimes my head is so full of dialogue and scenes and plot problems that I can’t really focus on anything else. I snap at my kids, I let housework pile up, I forget appointments.

But other times, it’s not the writing. It might be the social media, or the workshops, or just my family life. I feel so often like I am being pulled in multiple directions, and all I want is a little peace and quiet. Which makes me feel guilty. Is it bad to dream about running away? How about if you’re 41 years old? Seriously, I have fantasies about hiking the Appalachian trail by myself. Or booking a Caribbean vacation for one. Not very nice fantasies for a wife and mother to have!

But I need more than ten minute blocks of time. I need more quiet, less phone calls/text alerts/deadlines. I need to focus, but I find it more and more difficult to do so. And then I worry that this trouble focusing means there is something wrong with me. Will I have my grandmother’s dementia? My mother’s brain cancer? Am I slipping???

I don’t know. All I can do is try to keep going. I’ve recently begun using my iPhone for more than just scrolling tumblr. I’m using the reminders and calendar and notes to keep myself on task and it is helping a little. How about you? Do you ever suffer from a lack of focus? What do you do about it? Any tricks for a frazzled writer?

10 thoughts on “Scatterbrain! (iwsg post)

  1. Hi Amelia. I’m one of the co-hosts today and I have such empathy for what you wrote here. I’m much older and retired and have lots of quiet, but I know I’m someone who needs that desperately. There’s nothing wrong with you for wanting it and it doesn’t make you a bad wife and mother for needing some time for yourself. I hope you find a way to find it.

    • Thanks, Karen. Adding to my angst is that my kids are right on that pre-teen cusp (they are 9 & 11) and I know that too soon they won’t be so clingy and demanding, and I keep feeling I should enjoy them while I have them. So it’s quite a mother-lode of guilt! LOL

      Thanks so much for stopping by. I will have a peaceful cup of coffee with your kind words in mind 🙂

  2. Yes, I sometimes suffer from the lack of focus and especially when I am feeling overwhelmed. I had the privilege to go to a writer’s workshop in Italy for a week by my little old lonesome self and it was fantastic! There was no one but me to think about and it was amazing how much I enjoyed myself. So wanting to have time alone is A-Okay. You have time to get in touch with yourself and listen to beat of your heart.

    • Good advice 🙂
      Wow a week long workshop in Italy sounds so great! That must have been a wonderful experience.
      I can’t manage that but maybe I’ll have a glass of wine alone and dream about it 😊

  3. Time really is key. Time where you can be confident that you won’t be disturbed. As rare as sacks of rubies. (In my case, I need the time AND absolutely no access to the internet…)

  4. Totally get where your coming from. I have 27 year old son with autistic body and an amazing heart at home. As full time caregiver I know interruptions and just wanting alone time to write.

    But under the noise of life is a quiet core of being. It’s possible to be fulfilled even with the interruptions.

    I am adding this topic to my blog soon and I hope you come and follow. I would love to hear your comments!

  5. I don’t know if this trick will work for you, but here it goes anyway. Take the same amount of time as the number of the month. So on the first you get one full minute of quiet. Most kids an husbands can do that. Then it progresses to 30-31 minutes on the 30th or 31st. They may have to go get ice cream, but I’m sure they can manage it for one day a month.

    Don’t feel guilty. It goes with the job.

    Anna from Elements of Writing

    • Ha! That is a good technique! I do get some peace, and I used to be able to do a lot more with it. I feel now that I am so bogged down with my “things to do” that I often end up accomplishing very little with my peaceful moments.
      So maybe I just need to keep my goals more clear, and try to only do one thing at a time.
      *sigh* I will keep trying!
      (right now I am at a NaNo write in, sipping chai latte while writing with my local NaNo-ers!!! I wrote 1000 words tonight!! so I’m feeling good right now 🙂 )

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